Full speed ahead

Had another apt with my Re yesterday for an u/s. Everything looks good, so transfer will be next Wed. Sept 8. It seems like such a waste that everything is looking good, yet I know I still won't get preggy. I don't know why we have to always get crappy embies. Between my own eggs and 2 different donors we've had over 50 eggs retrieved, over 20 embies created, and only one beautiful baby girl. You would think with that many eggs and embies that I would have been able to have more children. I see other ladies on message boards who have been able to have several kids with a lot less embies. Yes, I admit it, I'm jealous of other IF women. the ones who get preggy with twins on their first IVF cycle. Why couldn't I be that lucky!! I wouldn't trade Lydia for another child or two, I love her so much. I just wish I could have another baby. she's growing up so fast. It took four years to have her and I'm not ready for her to grow up so fast. I really have a feeling that none of the embies will survive the thaw, or if any do, my Re will say that none of them are good enough to bother with the transfer. 2 other couples used our donor before us. Both couples had twins and had lots of good embies to freeze. While I'm somewhat glad that we didn't have twins, I still want to have another baby now. I'm so greatful for Lydia, but I still want another baby and it sucks feeling like I won't be able to have one. Once this cycle is done, that's it. No more cycling, no more hoping, no thinking about another child. I know I'll still want one more than anything, but there's nothing I can do to have one. It sucks!!! It's so unfair!!!